Coaching styles
Coaching is a deliberate conversation that helps someone think through a challenge, make a decision or build a skill. Different situations call for different coaching styles - sometimes the coachee needs answers, sometimes they need space to find their own.
Directive coaching
Directive coaching means giving advice, sharing experience and pointing toward a solution. The coach holds the expertise and shares it openly. This style works when:
- The coachee is new to the situation and needs guidance.
- Time is short and a decision must be made quickly.
- Safety, compliance or technical correctness matter.
- The coach genuinely knows the answer.
The risk of directive coaching is dependency - if the coach always provides the answer, the coachee never builds their own judgement.
Non-directive coaching
Non-directive coaching draws the answer out of the coachee through questions, listening and reflection. The coach assumes the person has the resources to solve their own problem. This style works when:
- The coachee has the experience or capability to figure it out.
- The decision is theirs to own and act on.
- Long-term development matters more than the immediate answer.
- The coach genuinely does not know the right answer for this person.
Non-directive coaching builds capability and ownership but takes longer and requires real discipline from the coach not to jump in.
The GROW model
GROW, developed by Sir John Whitmore, is the most widely used non-directive coaching framework. It structures a coaching conversation in four stages:
- Goal - What do you want to achieve from this conversation? What does success look like?
- Reality - What's happening now? What have you tried? What's getting in the way?
- Options - What could you do? What else? If anything were possible, what would you try?
- Will (or Way forward) - What will you do? By when? What support do you need?
GROW gives the coach a simple structure to follow without being prescriptive about the content. It keeps the agenda with the coachee.
Other useful approaches
Your default coaching move is to:
Concentrates on what is already working and how to do more of it, rather than analysing the problem in depth. Useful when energy is low or the issue feels overwhelming.
Choosing your style
The best coaches sit on a spectrum from fully directive to fully non-directive and move along it depending on the moment. A useful test: if the coachee leaves with your answer, you were directive; if they leave with their answer, you were non-directive. Both are legitimate - the question is which one this person, in this situation, actually needs.
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